So often, you hear people talk about a “bucket list” – all the different things they want to achieve, experience and/or attend in the future etc. Whilst it is always important to have goals to aspire to, I think it’s equally important – if not, more – to focus on what you have already achieved.

By nature, I am a glass half full person. If a relationship or friendship ends, I can still easily acknowledge the lessons learnt from that and also embrace the memories we had together. I strongly believe that every relationship we have shapes us into the person we later become.

Therefore, when I went to bed tonight, I couldn’t help but smile. I had another great day at work, came home and had a chat to my husband, then spent the night just having my own time watching my favourite show on Netflix.

As I lay in bed, I reflected on how I am grateful for different accomplishments. Here are some of the moments, memories and goals that have gotten me this far and made me who I am:

* I am grateful that I was able to juggle my Youth Work studies whilst being a Mum of 3 kids under 8 and working from home as a freelance journalist. Today I work in a Youth Work job that I absolutely love. I am grateful that all my hard work paid off. For the past 10 years, I have had the privilege of primarily working in Community Services & Community Development.

* I am grateful that I survived child abuse, alongside family and domestic violence. It taught me the importance of loving and valuing your children – as well as the importance of emotional safety.

* I am grateful to have loved and been loved several times – it is what led me to my now husband who is the perfect fit for me, challenges me and complements me so well.

* I am grateful to my best and close friends for supporting me when I needed them the most. They taught me that even friends can become your family.

* I am grateful for every job I have ever had, no matter how detrimental they were to my health. They taught me that every negative experience has positive value – and that all skills will play some level of benefit to your life.

* I am grateful for those who have hurt me. Without that pain, I would not have learnt how to assert boundaries, how to say no, how to do what is right for me.

* I am grateful for my health, for the fact that I have a roof over my head, the fact that I have food.

I know firsthand how it feels to be at risk of homelessness, to worry you won’t have food on the table, to worry you might get assaulted at home and at work, to not feel safe in your own home, to work in jobs you absolutely hate.

However, I also know firsthand how to work through those challenges, even with minimal support and become a stronger version of yourself.

So I don’t sweat the small stuff. I don’t focus all my time on how I look, how others might perceive me, my house being immaculately clean or get caught up in what others think. I don’t focus my whole attention on just making money, having a bigger house.

Life is just too short.

When you have overcome child abuse, family and domestic violence, then PTSD – you find happiness in the small things because in the end, they are the big things. The moments you get to laugh with your family and friends, the moments you get to hold each other, the moments you have to open up and be vulnerable with each other – they are what truly matter.

Always remember to focus on the positive and on what you do have. Always remind yourself that better days are ahead. Always reach out to others. Always remember you’re not alone.

If I can survive all the things I have and finish writing a book – you can certainly overcome your experiences as well.