Today, I had the opportunity to reminisce on the past 5 years of my life. Tyler Ward, a talented musician on YouTube, asked his Facebook fans:
“Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now?”
And I knew exactly what my answer would be. Five years ago, before I met my husband, before I had my kids – I was going through some emotional issues with people who had hurt me, which made me question where I was in life and the part I had to play.
I remember feeling so alone, like nobody understood how I felt. And despite all that, I continued to study for my exams and was accepted into University. I continued to drift, though, doing well in my studies, making plenty of friends, yet pretending that everything was okay even though I knew it wasn’t.
I realise now, though, that all those people who hurt me 5 years ago never deserved to have me in their life at all. It sounds so simple, yet it takes a lot of experience to realise that it is better to have, say, 3 friends who appreciate you, than to have 50 who don’t.
Funny thing is, I look back on it and think I must have been really stupid to have let such fools into my life. But when you’re growing up, you yearn to feel loved and sometimes you overlook the things that matter most.
Now I have a husband who would do anything for me – drive because he knows that I get stressed out in traffic, cook for me and the kids even when he’s about to go to a midnight shift, and love me despite all the faults that I think I have.
And the most important thing of all is that he understands me, I can see myself so much in him and so much of him in me. We make eachother better people and we are better parents for it.
So if you’re wondering, my response to Tyler’s question was:
“That was right before I met my husband and I was going through a tough time. But those experiences shaped me into who I am today and now I know how important it is to appreciate the people that deserve you and to forget about those that don’t.
Now I’m married with 2 kids (and 1 on the way), and I wake up everyday happy :)”
Honestly, I am so very happy. Who knew that in such a short time, my attitude towards life could change. I have a reason to wake up in the mornings, a reason to smile even when things are tough. And I realise now that without all those experiences, I wouldn’t be who I am today.
I try not to regret anything in life because I believe that everything happens for a reason. All experiences, whether good or bad, are there to challenge you, make you a stronger person and teach you different things about life.
And those experiences did challenge me, make me stronger and teach me things. But now, I can look back and honestly say that NO, it doesn’t matter anymore.
All that matters is that I LOVE where my life is, who I get to share it with, and the fact that I am exactly where I want to be.