Moving Forward

Seeking Closure: Is It Really The End?

Life is full of many great beginnings. Our first car, our first relationship, our first job. But like all great things, they eventually have to come to an end. We can’t hold onto them forever.

But how do we know if it’s really the end? How do we seek closure & end that chapter of our lives? We can answer this by separating what our heart and head tells us.

When we have to say goodbye to something or someone we’ve had in our lives, we feel attached and hesitant to let go. We’ve become accustomed to having it/them around. So, when it comes time to say goodbye, we are filled with melancholy and start to question our decision with moving forward.

But what exactly is making us go back on our word?

Imagine you’re in a relationship that makes you unhappy. You know you’d be happier apart. So, you decide to break it off. Then you start feeling sentimental and wondering if you’ve made the right choice. But be honest with yourself – are you questioning your decision because you really think you could be happy, or just because you miss the other person? Chances are, it’s because you miss that other person; you missed what you two had. It’s the memories that are holding you back, not your desire of moving forward.

So what is it that we want then?

Photo credit:David Castillo Domninici /

Well, in life, whether it be a car, a relationship, a job, or some other life choice; we struggle so much with separating what our heart and head say – they usually want two different things. We want so badly to hold onto that car that we learned to drive in, the relationship that we thought would last forever, the job that felt safe; but in reality, that’s not what we really want or need.

It’s so easy to stay in one spot because it’s safe; it’s kept us happy for so long already. But what if the end of something means the beginning for something else? What if by seeking closure and realising it’s the end, we could be even happier than before?

What we want is to move forward, but we are too attached to the past to do it. We are afraid of where the future will lead.

Seeking closure when it really is the end.

You will know when you’re making the ‘right’ decision. You’ll know because you’ll be able to separate your heart and your head.

When you are able to walk away feeling sad but knowing that you’ve made the ‘right’ decision, that is how you’ll know it really is the end. That is how you’ll find closure.

And when you finally reach the end, you’ll be many steps closer to a new beginning.

Thuy Le (formerly known as Thuy Yau) is a freelance writer and Youth Work graduate living in Perth, Australia. She loves to share her own personal experiences about overcoming adversity, as she believes that human beings are more capable than they realise. She writes to make a positive difference in the world and to inspire others to learn from themselves and their own experiences. Her writing has been discussed on radio, won writing contests, appeared on The Huffington Post UK and major Australian sites such as, SMH, Kidspot and Essential Kids. She has just completed her first book – a memoir - and is on the search for a publisher.

2 thoughts on “Seeking Closure: Is It Really The End?

  1. I’m not always sure it’s as easy as that Thuy. I think sometimes we have to make decisions but it doesn’t feel right once the decisions made even though you know somewhere it is right. It’s confusing and life is not always that clear cut … that’s why it’s not so easy, but a nice post all the same.

    1. I actually agree with you, it isn’t clear cut.

      But when we make a decision that we have trouble coming to terms with, deep down inside we know we are making the right decision.

      It doesn’t necessarily mean we’re happy with it, it doesn’t mean we like the decision we’ve made; we are just doing what we think is best.

      There have been many times in my life where I’ve questioned my decisions but deep down inside, I always knew I was doing the right thing!

      Thanks for your comments! 🙂

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